I turn 32 this month. Looking back on my 20’s and in college, I was full of excitement and eager to start my career. I quickly learned that reality is not as kind as my aspirations were/are. I also learned that reality is full of surprises, lessons, gifts and wonder. Growing older has been a really fun journey. I’m embracing my gray hairs, the wrinkles and some of the aches that creep in each year. I’ll whole heartedly share that there are still plenty of insecurities I have, they’re just much more different than when I was 12, 22 and even from last year. The weird thing is, though, even with these new insecurities, I’m way more confident in my skin than I was in my twenties. So, without further ado, here are some lessons, insights, tips and things I’ve learned these last 32 years on this planet.

1. You’re not too old to start. Whether it’s learning a new hobby, a new job or going back to school, you’re not too old.
2. Debt is dumb. I’m very thankful that my husband and I were able to pay off all our student loans before marriage and having a family. We worked multiple jobs and sacrificed a lot to get there. Holy cats am I happy we don’t have those payments to make. Buy what you can afford, don’t live up with the Jones’s. Those dudes are depressed as fuck because they have payments up to their eyeballs. If you’re in your twenties and reading this, this is the number one thing I can’t stress enough. Don’t worry about having the best car right after college or the fanciest clothes/shoes/house whatever. Not worth it. I’m not suggesting you can’t have fun – just be responsible with your money. Every dollar spent is investing in your future and well being.
3. The timing is never going to be perfect. This goes with #1 and with everything else like marriage and kids. If you keep waiting for everything to be perfect, it’s not going to happen.
4. Friends will come and go and that’s okay. It’s totally natural to make new ones, outgrow old ones or rekindle past friendships.
5. Being a mom with two kids, I’ve learned to lean into the chaos. I’m no pro at it, believe me. My patience needs more work, but I’m slowly learning the chaos is here to stay and I just need to learn to lean into it. Embrace it and work with it.
6. Marriage is hard and it’s messy. We’re still young in our together-ness, but we’re pushing a decade together. 5 years dating and coming up on 4 years married. My biggest takeaway so far, is that when we communicate, we’re good. Even when we’re angry at each other, if we talk about it, we’re good.
7. You can’t do it alone.
8. Failure is inevitable. Embrace it and learn from it.
9. Failure will happen many times. It’s okay – it will help you grow and give you opportunity to be a better version of yourself.
10. More people will die the older you get. I don’t know if this is because as adults we take note of it more and it resonates with us more, but there is for sure more deaths than I can remember in my teens. Appreciate the people you love and let them know you love them.
11. Depression is very real and it does not discriminate. Seek help and listen to those who need it.
12. Eat the damn cake. Have the cookie. Lick the spoon. Maybe just don’t eat the whole batch/pan.
13. Take care of yourself. The older you get, the harder life is on you. More stress, more responsibilities and your body just naturally deteriorates over the years. Your body is a machine, so take care of it if you want to enjoy the life we’re given.
14. It’s okay to disagree and it’s okay if your’e the only one that’s wrong/different or on the other side of everyone else. Be confident in yourself. It’s okay to stand alone.
15. Take vacations. Work to live, don’t live to work.
16. Find your passion and nurture it. I believe everyone has a calling and it’s a responsibility to see that (those) through. It might not be a job, self employment or something super theatrical. It could be as simple as volunteering, babysitting, activism, or dog walking. If it’s something you’re good at and enjoy, you’re providing a huge service to your community by sharing it. If you hide it and pursue it, that’s a real shame.
17. Date nights are a must in marriage; make time for them.
18. Don’t be too proud to ask for help.
19. Being a parent is the hardest job
20. Life is better with less social media.
21. Have a morning routine. It doesn’t have to be extravagant, but it should be something to help set up your day. Morning routines look different for everyone. For me it’s an hour of self care which could be watching a show, catching up on a podcast, drinking my coffee or having a morning workout. That and an hour of getting up and helping get the girls ready for daycare. Each morning is different, but I have 2 hours that’s blocked off just for that.
22. Keep learning. Learn something new every year, at least.
23. Super duper long instagram posts are usually regurgitated ‘authentic’ bull shit. Not always, but often times yes.
24. Take time to be still.
25. It’s okay to be content. Being happy with what you have gives your perspective and time to be grateful. Also refer to #2.
26. Quality time is great, so is wasted/lazy/dumb time. Some of the best memories happen from boredom.
27. Got a dog? Walk it.
28. Drink more water.
29. Your ego isn’t all that cool.
30. Say your sorry more often, even if you’re right. Sometimes you have to pick and choose your battles and sometimes it’s just not worth the energy to fight it.
31. To follow that, being angry all the time brings out the ugly side of anyone. Let that shit go if you can.
32. FOMO is a real thing, but sleep is better… and healthier.

There are more things to this I’m sure I can add to, but I think this is a pretty solid list of things I’ve taken away from my 32 years. Heres to good health, good food, good drinks, good fun and good friends.